Everybody always asks “Why do girls always go for the assholes and ignore the nice guys?” Even girls ask themselves why they keep going for guys they know are bad for them. We’ve all done it. And we all continue to do it over and over again, especially as young women – and this is why! (I think)
Girls like ‘assholes’ and ‘jackasses’ because they are exciting and fun and unpredictable, and girls like the element of surprise. What we unfortunately fail to realize for a very very long time is that mixed in with these fun qualities are shitty ones like, for instance:
‘SURPRISE I ignored you for a bunch of days but here I am’ or
‘SURPRISE I fucked your best friend’ or
‘I’m gonna take you out to dinner and then SURPRISE never talk to you again after that’.
It takes a couple of years for girls to realize that constant unpredictability and surprises will frequently come with really bad times and a lot of nights that involve bundled up in a blanket, crying like crazy and drinking wine right out of the bottle thinking “why does this always happen to me?!” while our friends assure you that “he’s an asshole and he will never really love anyone because he doesn’t know how” and “honey you’re perfect!”
Until one day, you get your Starbucks and you’re just minding your own damn business when BAM! An epiphany the weight and size and general shape of a brick just slams you in the face!
When we’re finally ready to understand, we realize that unpredictability and spontaneity are two very different things, and the ‘good’ guys are more likely to be spontaneous but also consistent and more predictable and when you finally meet one you like then there’s no surprise when he’s not hurrying to get dressed and jump out your bedroom window in the middle of the night.